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Embracing my curly hair (and why I don’t use the curly girl method)

October 30, 2019 by zenbelly 92 Comments

I have been fighting with my hair most of my life. This year, I decided to finally start embracing my curly hair. As a tiny human, I had fine, stick straight hair. You know how it goes; people with straight hair want curly hair and vice versa. In third grade, my dad let me get a perm at JC Penny. (My mom was thrilled, as you can probably imagine.) It wasn’t until years -YEARS! – later that I realized the perm was long gone and my hair, at some point, had become naturally curly.

embracing my curly hair

It wasn’t until this year – I am 42 – that I started to learn how to treat my hair like curly hair. Up until that point, I ran the gamut of blowdrying / burning it straight (and of course then adding “beachy” waves with more heat), getting keratin treatments, braiding / twisting it while it dried to keep it from turning into a total frizzy mess, and trying every shampoo and conditioner on the planet. I was hopeful that the perfect product or hair cut existed to give me wash and wear hair.

I have never had anything against curly hair, in fact I have always loved it on other people. I always just assumed that I didn’t have Good Curly Hair. I mean, if I simply wash it and let it air dry, I absolutely do not have Good Curly Hair.

Here’s an example of just how bad my hair can be; this is after a couple of weeks in mineral hot springs in Costa Rica:

curly girl

While scrolling Facebook this summer, I saw an ad for a curly hair product that made me realize – HOLD UP. I just haven’t been treating my hair like curly hair. That was my big curly hair aha moment. And that’s when I fell deep into the curly girl method rabbit hole.

It’s been 3 months of researching and experimenting with the Curly Girl method and variations of it, and I’m finally coming up for air. I’ve been sharing my progress on Instagram, and people on there have expressed interest in what I’m doing and what I’m using, so I’m spilling it all on this here blog post.

Here I am after my first wash day, using (sort of) the curly girl method:

curly girl

And here I am after wash day number two; already a pretty big difference:

curly girl

Getting a curly cut made the biggest difference. Curls need layers and shape. Going to a curly hair specialist resulted in the cut my hair really needed:

curly girl

This blog post is not intended to be a rabbit hole, so I’ll sum up the Curly Girl Method for you.

What to avoid on the Curly Girl Method:

  • shampoo
  • heat styling
  • brushing your hair (especially when dry)
  • terry cloth towels
  • sulfates, parabens, and silicones.
embracing my curly hair

One of my better hair days when my hair was this length. I keep going shorter, but this photo makes me want to grow it out! Hmmmm… 

What I think about all of that:

I can easily get behind eliminating certain ingredients. No problem there. I’m happy to use a micorfiber towel and t-shirt instead of a terry cloth towel to get the excess moisture out of my hair. And if brushing my hair when it’s dry is only causing damage, that’s not something I’ll miss. On those elements, I’m all about the Curly Girl Method.

As far as shampoo goes, I haven’t found any cowash (cleansing conditioner) that I like. Low lather? Sure. No lather? Nah. I need a little lather for my scalp to feel clean.

I haven’t plugged in my flat iron or barrel roller for months, and I feel great about that. However, using zero heat to dry my hair means my hair is wet for hours; we’re basically talking all freaking day. That’s just not practical. My hair dryer has a cold, warm and hot setting. I use it on warm until it’s mostly dry and then switch to cold to finish it. My curly hair specialist stylist gave me the okay on this, btw. She uses heat to dry in her salon, and just advised against using flat iron level heat. If you can smell your hair burning, that is way too hot.

What I have found over the course of 3 months – my big takeaways:

  • Technique is as important, maybe even more important than, the products.
  • There is as much dogma in the curly hair world as there is in the food world. (Hard pass on both)
  • It is a process. Do not expect your hair to be magically changed after one wash day. My hair has continued to get curlier (and healthier) week after week.
  • In the epic battle against frizz, I’ve found the things that have helped the most are: using a moisturizing shampoo, and applying leave-in conditioner.
  • Products are necessary. I was so low maintenance once upon a time, and those days are over.
  • Curly hair needs moisture, and products all need to be applied to wet hair.
  • Using less heat means longer dry time. A microfiber towel was one of the best purchases I made, it cuts my dry time in about half!

What has worked on my curly hair – technique:

My wash day routine (every 3rd day or so, based on how my scalp feels and how my hair looks)  to cleanse:  I shampoo using a low lather, moisturizing shampoo, and then condition- I apply plenty of conditioner, both raking it in and squishing it in – Squish to Condish- it’s a thing. This is when I detangle, using my fingers and sometimes a wide toothed comb. I leave the conditioner in for a few minutes (singing optional) and then rinse with warm (cool is good too, but not hot) water.

To style: Still in the shower, I gently scrunch out a little bit of the moisture, but not much, and then apply leave-in conditioner, and detangle again. For the following steps, I do most of it flipped over, with my hair hanging off the top of my head: I apply a defining cream, which I rake in gently for even distribution, and then glaze in (between flat hands, like you’re putting them together in prayer, if you will, and/or use a curly hair brush like this one to clump my curls. Then I scrunch.  Then I apply a gel also using the praying hands method, and then scrunch.

And then, if I haven’t fallen in the slippery shower and knocked myself unconscious by this point, I use the microfiber towel to squeeze out the excess moisture.  And then  – can you even believe – I scrunch in a wee bit more gel. Isn’t it funny that going natural is way more work than burning the shit out of it was? Hilarious.

Finally, I plop with an old t-shirt. I would not do a great job explaining how to plop, so the google is your friend in this situation.

I leave the plop on for 20-30 minutes, and then I take it off and do a combo of air drying and diffusing on medium and low heat. It doesn’t matter what kind of hair dryer and diffuser you have, but make sure you know how to use it. I realized after watching this video that I was doing it all wrong. Once you’re there, feel free to go ahead and watch all Mel’s videos, she’s hilarious and they’re super informative.

Searching for curly hair videos on Youtube? You’ll easily fall into the Curly Girl rabbit hole. Bring snacks.

Before and after in one photo- wild right? My curly side is looking a little lower, which is disturbing, but you get the idea:

curly girl

What has (and hasn’t) worked on my curly hair – products:

I’ve tried a bunch of curly hair products, and will probably continue to try more if they look promising. I am aware that my hair will continue to change and get healthier, so the first products I tried might “work better” now than they did when I was new to the curly hair thing. Keeping that in mind, I’ll rotate them all and try ones I wasn’t sure about originally.

My consistent favorites so far have been from Bouncecurl. I use the moisturizing shampoo (on most days), clarifying shampoo (once every few weeks), the cream conditioner, leave-in conditioner, clump and define cream, and cream gel.

The first curly products I tried were from LUS, which I liked at first, but didn’t love after a few washes. The shampoo is on the clarifying side (more lather, less moisturizing) and the 3-in-1 third step isn’t quite enough for my hair. The scent is also not my favorite.

I was excited to try the line from Raw Curls, since it is probably the cleanest line of products I’ve come across so far. I love their gels and their anti-frizz spray, but haven’t loved their shampoo and conditioner. Like I mentioned above, I will try them again now that my hair has changed quite a bit!

Needed a haircut. Covid times. Did it myself. If I don’t style my hair when it’s SOAKING wet, I get way less definition. Which is okay, I don’t mind the variation! This is also the shortest I’ve gone. 

Most recently, I used the softening 4 step system from Curl Mix. It definitely made my hair softer, but I didn’t get quite as much definition as I have with the Bouncecurl and Raw Curls stylers. (update 9/4/20: I’ve been really liking the Curl Mix moisturizer and flax gel. It gives me the best crunch, which is just so satisfying to scrunch out once it’s completely dry.)

On my list to try: Innersense and Rahua, but this shit is getting expensive so I might stick with Bouncecurl for a while since I know it works!

Here is my most recent hair, about 3 months in of treating my hair like curly hair!

As I mentioned, this is a process, so I will continue to update you with my favorite new products and techniques I like for my curly hair! Do you have favorite curly products you think I should try? Let me know in the comments.

More non-food girly shit can be found here and here.


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Filed Under: skincare Tagged With: curly girl method, curly hair, embracing curls

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Comments

  1. Juie says

    October 30, 2019 at 5:53 pm

    Time to update your pic on the blog curly queen!

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      October 30, 2019 at 6:10 pm

      I know right? New kitchen, new hair, no money! hah!

      Reply
  2. Kelly says

    October 30, 2019 at 6:01 pm

    What about days you don’t shampoo? Get it wet in the shower? Brush it out? Reapply anything?

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      October 30, 2019 at 6:10 pm

      I never ever brush when it’s dry, and I’ve never washed my hair every day. Sometimes I give it a little spritz with water, sometimes I use the anti-frizz spray from Raw Curls. I don’t do much, and often have a high pony situation by the third day. There are definitely people who have mastered the refresh, but I have not!

      Reply
  3. Jillian says

    October 30, 2019 at 7:55 pm

    My hair is super wavy and fine so I’m in a constant battle of how much product is too much product? Currently, I like The Ouai air dry foam and I also like deva curl’s wave maker.
    I also Want to try Rahua but the price tag… sheesh….

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      October 31, 2019 at 2:21 pm

      It definitely requires some trial and error! I tried to go super light on product just to see, and it didn’t go so well haha. And yeah Rahua is pricey, but people who love it really love it!

      Reply
  4. Nicole says

    October 30, 2019 at 9:21 pm

    These last pics are my favorite curly pics of your hair yet! It looks really great! I’m also a big fan of the Bouncecurl Light Cream Gel and the Clarifying Shampoo.

    I bought trial sizes of Innersense and ended up splurging on the full sizes of several products. I bought the trial sizes from another green beauty website so I could save the first time customer discount on their website for the full sizes. It’s true their products behave a little differently than others, so there’s a learning curve. I quite like the I Create Hold gel as a single styler (although sometimes I cheat and use a few spritzes of the Finish hairspray right before diffusing when I want to cheat and use drying alcohol).

    I’d recommend Giovanni — their products are so affordable and are some of my favorites. I especially love the 50:50 Balanced shampoo and conditioner. (I find that conditioner has more slip than the Deeper Moisture Silk one.) Also the Turbo Charged mousse/foam, and the Direct Leave-in (super light). They have a great selection of trial sizes on their website, and they shipped quickly. (But otherwise you can find them at WF or more cheaply on Vitacost.)

    I also just tried and liked the Design Essentials Almond & Avocado Mousse (it has two water-soluble silicones, FYI, has a strongish scent, and is mid-priced at Ulta).

    Sorry for the long comment – I’ve been rediscovering my curly hair lately too, if you couldn’t have guessed!

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      October 31, 2019 at 2:20 pm

      Awesome thanks! I need to try Giovanni for sure, their stuff seems really reasonably priced, and this situation is getting expensive!

      Reply
    • Jennifer Hudson says

      November 27, 2021 at 7:14 am

      Have you tried jessicurl? I just learned about taking care of curly hair and in my research that was recommended.

      Reply
      • zenbelly says

        November 27, 2021 at 11:52 am

        I haven’t personally, but my hair stylist has used it on me and I’ve liked it.

  5. Linda Allasia says

    October 30, 2019 at 9:37 pm

    Your hair looks fabulous!! I wonder if Carolyn knows about this?

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      October 31, 2019 at 12:20 pm

      Thank you! I’m not sure, she has gorgeous hair!

      Reply
  6. Emma says

    October 31, 2019 at 1:12 am

    My hair also turned curly after 2 perms in the 80s! I recently discovered salt spray – that seems to make a difference too.

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      October 31, 2019 at 12:16 pm

      Oh interesting! I always figured salt spray would be bad for my hair since gong to the beach makes me look like a crazy person haha. I’ll have to try it!

      Reply
  7. Elise says

    October 31, 2019 at 4:10 am

    You’re curly hair is looking beautiful!
    I’m a fan of Jessicurl styling products. They work great and they’re available unscented.

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      October 31, 2019 at 12:15 pm

      Awesome, I will check them out! Thanks!

      Reply
      • Crystal says

        August 4, 2020 at 6:55 pm

        You can get free samples from Jessicurl. Just pay shipping. I love that because I buy so much…stockpile…then have to give away what I don’t use. Free samples are a great option!!

      • zenbelly says

        August 5, 2020 at 11:27 am

        oh that’s great to know! I’m currently going through all of my half used bottles I’ve bought over the past year haha

  8. Wendy says

    October 31, 2019 at 3:06 pm

    Your hair looks beautiful! I’ve been using innersense for about 6 weeks now and am happy with it so far. It was definitely an adjustment from conventional salon stuff. I use their color radiance hair bath and sweet spirit leave in conditioner. I found the regular conditioner to be too heavy for my hair, which was so different from other products. For styling, I use the I create volume foam and that’s it!

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      October 31, 2019 at 9:12 pm

      Thank you! I really want to try Innersense stuff.

      Reply
  9. Mel says

    November 2, 2019 at 8:01 pm

    Thanks for sharing this! So helpful and I need to try the bouncecurl products. Most of the curly hair shampoos (currently using Devacurl) make my hair feel greasy after 2 days so I rotate between them and the conventional shampoos (I use Alterna). How do you sleep so that your hair wakes up with defined curls? I find that my curls become a frizzy bomb when I wake up, forcing me to deal with it by tying it up. Love this post!!!

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      November 3, 2019 at 4:30 pm

      Glad it was helpful! I sleep with my hair in a pineapple, aka super high pony. Second day hair definitely isn’t as good as first day hair, but it’s not bad.

      Reply
    • krista says

      March 31, 2020 at 7:28 pm

      Silk scarf! Keeps hair nice and smooth so all you have to do is refresh. A little flat but no frizz.

      Reply
  10. Elizabeth says

    November 4, 2019 at 6:51 am

    I am pretty sure my return the the curls started shortly before yours and it’s such a process! I use deva curl because they have so many travel sizes and easier to find what works! Definitely considering the bounce curl though, I’ve heard great things from lots of YouTube strangers in the black hole of curly hair videos! My refresh day pretty much means take it out of the pineapple and spray it down with mister water bottle to reactivate all the product and let air dry again! I can go 3 days with hair down and then last day is pony for sure! Thanks for the tips!!

    Reply
    • Amanda says

      December 31, 2021 at 4:05 pm

      Be careful with devacurl! I loved the gel but the system caused a lot of hair loss for me.
      Also, olaplex damaged the integrity of my hair. Everyone is different

      Reply
  11. Angel_n_Alabama says

    November 7, 2019 at 6:21 am

    I love it! You look beautiful!

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      November 7, 2019 at 10:02 am

      Thanks so much!

      Reply
  12. Katie says

    November 7, 2019 at 8:38 am

    Inner sense is the best. I have Rahua Hydration and I’m going to ask my straight haired daughter to use it up because Innersense is the best. Pricey, but it lasts a long time!

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      November 7, 2019 at 10:01 am

      I definitely need to try it!

      Reply
  13. Wendy Fleisher says

    November 9, 2019 at 4:01 pm

    My daughter follows you on Instagram and sent me this post because I recently decided to embrace my natural curls. Your post gives me hope and I think your hair looks amazing! I’m about 3 months into my transition and have admittedly fallen into the Curly Girl rabbit hole! Although pricey, I do love New Wash from Hairstory for cowashing. My hair feels clean and the product has a bit of slip to it. My hair is not long enough for the pineapple method, and I’ve discovered medusa clipping to be a great alternative. Not pretty, but very effective. Any chance you can share the name of curly hair specialist who cut your hair?

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      November 10, 2019 at 12:34 pm

      I’m so glad your daughter sent you my way! I went to Ivy at Hair of The Gods in Hayes Valley. I love her.

      Reply
  14. Katie says

    November 12, 2019 at 7:45 am

    Your curly hair is gorgeous!!!
    I’m so excited that you are embracing and honoring your natural hair. I’m a curly girl too and I feel like curls have some much personality- it’s like they are an accessory. I’ve been using Innersence products for a while and would highly recommend them. Pricey, yes, but green, clean and they deliver results.

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      November 13, 2019 at 8:47 pm

      Thank you! I definitely need to try Innersense, I’ve heard such great things about it.

      Reply
  15. Crystal says

    November 13, 2019 at 10:14 pm

    I love it!! I finally had some curls coming back after babies and a friend of ours was a curly hair stylist god so he gave me a curly cut and conditioner tricks. Then his funeral was on my next hair appointment day so it all makes me sad still. He was the sweetest dude too. Anywho I love watching you embrace your curls, especially since I’ve always thought our hair was so similar

    Reply
  16. EricaD says

    December 12, 2019 at 11:56 am

    I was looking for new products for my aging dry hair. I came across this your blog via Facebook. I ordered Bounce Curl shampoos, conditioner and leave in conditioner. Plus watched a few of their tutorial videos. Oh my! My gray curls returned after first wash!! Plus I changed the way I treated my hair after washing, letting it stay drippy wet & then add product. Not only do I use smaller amounts of shampoo & conditioner on my hair, but Bounce Curl smells wonderful. And I only have to wash my hair twice a week. Thank you for sharing your curly hair journey!!! 🙂

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      December 12, 2019 at 1:24 pm

      I’m so glad to hear that, Erica! <3

      Reply
      • Nadia says

        July 24, 2023 at 4:39 am

        I use Curl Keeper .I have tried many Curl products but keep going back to Curl Keeper and like you since I got a proper Curl Cut my straightener lives in the closet for the past 20 years

  17. monique says

    December 30, 2019 at 4:14 pm

    thanks to this post. i ordered bounce curl and have been using it for about a month. i love it. i wish i’d discovered it years ago… or before i chopped my curls short!! lol needless to say i’m growing it out with luscious curls!
    i have battled these curls for all of my 50 years. now is as good a time as any to embrace them. so again thank you!!

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      December 31, 2019 at 12:28 pm

      yay I’m so glad! Sometimes a big chop is the best thing, so your curls can grow in new and fresh. Here’s to luscious curls! <3

      Reply
  18. Baron Kanter says

    March 16, 2020 at 4:01 pm

    What do you do with all the product leftover after trying them? It seems that alone would get overwhelming.

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      March 17, 2020 at 4:34 pm

      it’s mostly in my bathroom still, some I’ve given to friends, and I have been meaning to find a place to donate it.

      Reply
  19. Marlee says

    June 1, 2020 at 7:13 am

    I am so relieved to find this post. It is refreshing to have finally found an honest review that is straight to the point. I can completely identify! I actually read it right before I tried CurlMix. I feel the same; I obtained the softness but had given up big bouncy curls. No thanks! I’d rather have frizz all day (I actually love my frizz). I am about to get both Innersense and BounceCurl in the mail.

    My story: I quit DevaCurl in February after women came out with their stories. I quit and noticed my breakage, scalp itch, and dandruff stop within 2 weeks. My hair is now more beautiful with nothing used than on DevaCurl.

    I now use a scalp massager, castor oil/sunflower oil before a wash, apple cider vinegar to rinse once a week, and a silk pillowcase. I can’t believe I ignored my scalp for so long! It is so important.

    I now use:
    Wellnesse shampoo (awesome ingredients, maybe too much lather)
    Kinky Curly shampoo (low lather, minimal ingredients)
    Wellnesse conditioner (like but don’t love)
    Kinky Curly leave-in conditioner (THE BEST)

    I can’t believe how amazing Kinky Curly leave-in works in my 3a-3b hair. How can this be 8 bucks? The only difference I see is their added marshmallow root. Maybe this is the key!

    Can’t wait to try Bounce Curl and Innersense! I will update you. Also, what kind of blow dryer and diffuser do you use? I am considering the expense of a dyson. Thank you for your raw information!

    Reply
    • Christianne says

      November 23, 2020 at 5:16 pm

      Hi…just found this post today (while looking for her apple pie bar recipe) and I have been a Deva Curl product user for years now. I always thought my scalp itchiness was just me! I am definitely taking notes here and plan on trying some new products. Aging, going grey and thyroid issues have caused my hair to thin a bunch and change texture…so definitely need to take care of my hair while I hopefully still have it. 🙂

      Reply
  20. KaZ Cruse Akers says

    June 22, 2020 at 9:44 am

    Absolutely love the fringe! Yours looks wonderful. I am trying to coax mine in that direction. Sometimes they just twist whichever way they like. I have more wavy hair in the front and very curly hair in the back and I am someone who does not like to fuss too much to get it all to be uniform. So I am experimenting. Thanks for the wonderful post.

    Reply
  21. Mia says

    July 1, 2020 at 3:48 am

    Well what you describe as a bad hair is GORGEOUS! I would like that.

    Reply
  22. Dot says

    August 8, 2020 at 12:06 pm

    This was very helpful to me! I like your ideas and your ability to fudge on some of the “roles”. And, your hair is lovely! Thank you!

    Reply
  23. Hair Salon Chch says

    September 7, 2020 at 9:43 pm

    Thanks a lot to you for sharing embracing my curly hair. here, these kind of ideas are were much needed. I really appreciate that you have provided the data too, really appreciative and useful blog for us. Looking for more!!

    Reply
  24. Brooke Hayward says

    September 23, 2020 at 3:08 am

    Perfect timing for this post! Appreciating the time and effort you put into your website and in-depth information you offer. You’ve really covered up almost all the possible info that every female should follow. Worth sharing! Please do continue sharing updates! Thanks!

    Reply
  25. Judy says

    September 25, 2020 at 8:06 pm

    I just started doing the curly girl method during Covid. It doesn’t seem to work for me. Maybe because my hair has got so long. It leaves my scalp feeling oily and dirty. I use a t shirt to dry my hair. Thank you for all of your research. I’m going to try that. Your hair looks amazing!

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      September 26, 2020 at 9:59 am

      Thanks Judy! It typically takes a while for hair to bounce back from being abused with heat styling, but if your scalp feels dirty, I’d just use a shampoo that really lathers, as opposed to a cleansing conditioner. I need to do that too- my scalp doesn’t feel clean if I don’t get good lather.

      Reply
  26. Ana says

    October 6, 2020 at 4:49 am

    I currently use CurlMix. Maybe you know…or not, the Vanilla Berry and Sensitive Line have the strongest hold (you will get a cast). I use the Sensitive line for the leave in and gel, and the watermelon line for shampooing and conditioning.

    By the way, your hair looks fantastic! Like you, I spent many years fighting my curly hair…and at the ripe ol’ age of 40 I tried to truly figure it out. The process was not pretty and lots, and lots of curly hair systems and products were purchased!! Now, four years later I have the curly hair I’d been looking for all my life. Your story made me laugh because I could totally relate. Although, in our defense we didn’t have all these curly product options growing up. It was aquanet, the blue gel stuff and Aussie which didn’t come out till the late 80’s early 90’s…Or maybe it wasn’t available in my are till then. Thanks for sharing your story! The struggle is real.

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      October 7, 2020 at 10:33 am

      Thanks, Ana! and you’re so right- Good curly products were not abundant back then. I need to try more stuff from Curl Mix, I started really loving their flax gel recently.

      Reply
  27. Hair says

    October 22, 2020 at 10:48 am

    Awesome post! Keep up the great work!

    Reply
  28. Glamha says

    November 1, 2020 at 1:42 am

    I use more heat on my hair in the winter than in the summer when natural waves are more acceptable. I definitely needed some tips on keeping it healthy.

    Reply
  29. Midlifecrisissexsymbol says

    November 1, 2020 at 1:37 pm

    You AND your hair are beautiful! I love reading curly journeys! I learn something new from every one, and love how there is now a curly community, as there wasn’t when I was growing up pre-blowdryer/pre-styling products. Women back then got weekly shampoo and styles at the local beauty shop; mousse didn’t happen until I was in college!

    I’m not a plop/plump fan, but prefer using the roller jaw clips from http://www.frizzoff.com. I also swear by their Curly Keeper Original product and their version of the Denman brush. Like LUS, they are a Canadian company dedicated to curly hair, but unlike LUS, their products are not heavy and greasy with an overwhelming odor that can be smelled across a football stadium. Their products smell light and fresh and the scent dissipates when dry, and their styling products are water-activated, so all I do is scrunch with wet hands on non-wash days!

    For my thick, medium long 3b curls, I rely on Davines Momo Shampoo and conditioner, and also use a little of the conditioner as a leave-in. Then I brush in the Curl Keeper Original with their Flexy brush, and if my hair is layered shorter, like it is now, clip the top section up for 20-30 minutes with the roller jaw clips to form curls on my harder to curl top (the weight drags them down), which also lets the hair underneath curl better and dry faster. This also helps with volume up top. Then I diffuse, which also helps with the curls and volume, and controls frizz. Plus who has time to let their hair dry for 8 hours?! When she’s running late, my curly stylist aims her heater vents at her hair while driving. Diffusing while driving- it works! 😉

    As for the COVID cuts, I am totally grateful to the professional tutorials from Free Salon Education on YouTube. Matt is an awesome stylist and trainer, and I can now cut my own hair, something I never thought I would do! It’s not as good as my stylist would do, of course, but as I have to stay in my bubble, it works. Not chancing coloring though with anything but the Davines temporary color my stylist sends me; curly hair is notoriously difficult to color. I miss my pretty color and my darling, talented stylist, but we all gotta be smart and stay safe.

    And yes on Mel- I watch her for fun!

    Reply
  30. Christianne says

    November 23, 2020 at 5:22 pm

    Who knew I would find great info and insight about curly hair on a food blog! I love it! Thanks for sharing your experiences. I am not one to keep trying different products, but Deva Curl just doesn’t seem to be working for me any more. So I’m excited to check out some suggestions you and others mentioned.

    Thanks for your work – and I’m going to find your apple pie bar recipe now. 🙂

    Reply
  31. LN says

    December 21, 2020 at 12:20 pm

    Month 8 of the pandemic and although I was mostly satisfied with my 3b curls, I headed down the rabbit hole of curly hair videos. I discovered Mel too and sooo much to learn! I have been trying different techniques and products every wash day and (nerd alert), keeping a table to show combos of products, techniques and ratings on definition, frizz and volume. I did say it was during the pandemic and was bored out of my kind, right? Nonetheless, loved seeing your approach and product choices. Per Mel and her seester, I’ve thrown plenty of $$ on some Curlsmith products and am really liking them. The air dry cream and hydro style flexi jelly would probably be great for your (2B?) curls. Anyway, happy good hair day! 🙂

    Reply
  32. Deb says

    January 9, 2021 at 6:49 pm

    I love your hair. I have high porosity, fine, wavy hair. Had ringlets when I was young…till i got a Pixie cut. Ugh. Anyway, battling a lot of frizz. Any suggestions? What is your hair porosity? The curly girl rabbit hole is REAL!

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      January 11, 2021 at 9:33 am

      SO REAL. I have found that leave in conditioner is the best thing to combatting / preventing frizz. I think my hair is medium porosity? I can’t remember. It’s going through an awkward phase lately, I need professional help as soon as salons are open again!

      Reply
      • Deb says

        January 11, 2021 at 11:20 am

        Thanks for your reply. It is definitely a process!

  33. Patience says

    January 12, 2021 at 12:35 am

    Generally, you have to stay away from hair treatments and products that include chemicals such as parabens, DEA or sulfates.

    Reply
  34. Sandra says

    January 13, 2021 at 8:31 pm

    Was wondering if you have given the LUS love your curls a try again? Did you find different results now?

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      January 15, 2021 at 1:52 pm

      I’ve used it a few times. I’m not a fan of the scent, and don’t think it does nearly as much as some of the other products. But everyone’s hair is different so it’s all about what works for you!

      Reply
  35. Domenic says

    January 14, 2021 at 7:41 am

    Too many are not aware that scalp therapy shampoos for fast hair growth (obviously with no sulfates, no parabens and no DEA) are a thing. We can now achieve longer hair and achieve more possibilities. Definitely worth considering. When you’re addressing alopecia, hair damage, preventing hair disorders, hair growth, hair care more often than not, almost the same principles come to mind. In general, you have to avoid hair products and treatments that use chemicals such as parabens, DEA or sulfates. What is healthy for your hair is beneficial for your skin all the same. Clearly the content here hits the nail in the head for so many reasons. It avoids the usual traps and errors most fall into- utilizing horrible alternatives. Keep up the great content!

    Reply
  36. Lany says

    February 6, 2021 at 1:17 am

    I wish i was able to do everything to let my hair be healthy but my dad won’t even let me trim it after i chopped it all off (at the time i didn’t even realize it would help me when i found out i had curls, i just like having short hair, it was a peter pan cut, my mom had been flat ironing my hair for my entire life nearly every day, apparently my dad didn’t realize with a little work my hair could be way prettier and said “nope you now have straight/wavy hair”, and after i chopped it all of the most i’d use was a brush straightener) and now that i’ve realized my texture my dad already thinks it’s really pretty even if the most i do is some leave in conditioner, no heat, and only shampoo once a week, but they arent willing to let me fully take all the steps to make it curl to the max, and i kniw if i treated it right it’d look really really pretty

    Reply
  37. Kiri says

    March 28, 2021 at 2:03 pm

    So glad I found this post! It stresses me out when I see blog posts that practically shame people for not using the CGM. If everyone has different skin and dietary needs then why would our hair routine be universal?
    Personally, I found trying to adhere to the CGM too stressful. I am super lazy and I need a lazy routine!
    Your curls are gorgeous and thanks for sharing your curl journey!

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      March 29, 2021 at 10:14 am

      Thanks, Kiri! And same: I tend to want to want to break rules when they seem too serious haha. I’m glad you found this post- lazy curlies unite 🙂

      Reply
  38. Courtney Roberts says

    April 6, 2021 at 9:46 pm

    Try the framesi no suds cowash. I’m a stylist with hair that used to be straight and now is wavy…as a stylist, we aren’t taught everything and are self taught once we become licensed. The framesi no suds is amazing and do not worry about the non lather. Add more water and you’ll feel it going through your hair better. Another thing I’ve discovered is aloe vera with manuka honey is amazing for frizz fighting and second day even third hair hair revamp of curls. Your curls are gorgeous and my curl goals!!!

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      April 10, 2021 at 9:27 am

      Thanks, Courtney!

      Reply
  39. Shelli Miller says

    April 9, 2021 at 7:00 am

    I know I am late to this post, but wanted to say that your hair is beautiful! If you haven’t already posted about it, I’d like to know if you have tried any drugstore products and if so, have you found any you like? I’m currently on DevaCurl, but I’m hearing so much bad stuff, that I am looking to use other products. Any time that I have tried other products, my hair feels like straw and I go right back to DC. I have 2C, fine, wavy, sometimes curly hair.

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      April 10, 2021 at 9:40 am

      Thanks, Shelli! I have used some drugstore products and have liked them fine. I think they were from Target, and were the Real Raw Coconut shampoo and condish and Maui Moisture shampoo and condish. Fructis stylers are another one I’ve tried. They’re not bad but I definitely love Ecoslay products the most these days.

      Reply
  40. Michelle Alberti says

    May 5, 2021 at 9:46 pm

    Omg love the journey your on! i started mine back in 2018 its been tough , i was a full long blonde which ruined my hair then slowly made my way back to my nagural light brown hair…but i can say what really helped my hair was Lush products ! i followed Amanda Bickets Curly hair Journey(youtube her), by using a shampoo, conditioner, hair moisture and a hair treatment and a lot of natural DIY hair masks, with a little bit of coconut oil and black jamacian castor oil, and i continue my journey with short curly hair!

    Reply
  41. Diana says

    May 13, 2021 at 8:08 pm

    I had to laugh when I saw your Brazillian vacation hair. That’s exactly what my hair looks like most days. And I laugh at my hair too, through my tears. Thanks for writing this. I’m going to try some of your suggestions.

    Reply
  42. Jeanette says

    May 23, 2021 at 3:13 pm

    Thanks for sharing your journey! I have thick 3a-b curls and recently found a shag cut to really help bring out the curls….im thinking of trying bounce curls now and someone else mentioned kinky curly too…been meaning to try as well..

    For me what has worked is Its a 10 shampoo and miraçle deep moisture conditioner….in the shower applying uncle funkys daughter curly magic and Shea Moisture make it last curl primer in sections using clips….once then towel dry then again …

    And for refreshing curls Uncle funkys makes a good one called thirsty curls but I have to flip and wet hair then use it….

    Also I noticed that swimming in springs has a good effect….

    Look forward to seeing another update from you.

    Reply
  43. Hope says

    June 20, 2021 at 6:01 pm

    Wow I feel like I’ve found my sisterhood on here! I can relate to every single comment and I almost feel like crying!

    Growing up, my grandma used to brush my curls dry before going out and I’ve never been more embarrassed of the poof – RULE ONE: NEVER BRUSH DRY! She had no idea about curls and simply thought it was me being messy (sigh)

    One thing I’ve loved is the moisture-rich pureology ranges and Mane n Tail does wonders for my texture and shape at such a low price – hey if it works on thick, course horse hair I’m happy to follow suit!

    Reply
  44. Tahara says

    August 2, 2021 at 9:36 pm

    Your hair looks great. It’s a myth you can’t dry your hair with any heat it’s flat iron or consistent high heat that’s the no-no with CG. Also low poo is still 100% CG if that’s what you choose (although some can still be drying as I found with my daughter). I’ve been cowashing CG 4yr and was modified cowash/low poo 6yrs before that I just didn’t know all about CG safe ingredients then. Definitely a process;)

    Reply
  45. Debbi says

    September 5, 2021 at 6:57 am

    The giovanni shampoo is great. I only wash my hair once every 5 days or if I ponytail another two days I go for a week. I tiMe my wash for the best hair on day 2 and 3. The secret for keeping the curls is a silk pillowcase – really makes as much difference as a microfiber towel – and a spritz and extra dollop of conditioner every morning. I use curlisto protein boost for the spritz and have been using Giovanni conditioner recently but tend to try different things.

    Reply
  46. Gen says

    October 24, 2021 at 6:53 pm

    This is probably the realest curly hair advice post I’ve seen thank you queen

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      October 24, 2021 at 8:31 pm

      so glad to hear it! Thanks 🙂

      Reply
  47. Melanie says

    November 4, 2021 at 9:08 am

    Great page! Love the info. Just started this journey 2 days ago.

    Reply
  48. volume shampoo says

    November 13, 2021 at 10:18 pm

    The attractiveness of curly hair is proven by this statistic alone. Curly haired people have been attracting mates every since the first curly hair spring out of the first round head countless generations ago.

    Reply
  49. Anna G. says

    January 16, 2022 at 7:38 am

    I just wanted to leave a note to say thank you for sharing your curl journey on this post. Reading your trials and errors (and successes!) was tremendously valuable to me. It gives me a place to start. Thanks again.

    Reply
  50. Sikha Jain says

    February 15, 2022 at 1:38 am

    Wow, I just loved how you have embraced your curly hair. For voluminous curls, I opt for kinky curly bundles. Can I apply these tips to embrace my kinky curly bundles?

    Reply
  51. Saisha says

    September 16, 2022 at 2:45 am

    Hey, I have curly hair and I also look for Sulfate-free Products. I also prefer Vegan, paraben-free, and silicon free. Currently, I am using Fix My Curls’s natural curly hair products . They are amazing. Can you please review that as well?

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      September 16, 2022 at 7:59 am

      sounds like you’ve already reviewed it 🙂

      Reply
  52. Debbie says

    October 23, 2022 at 6:37 pm

    I worry my hair is going to look greasy if I do the curl method have read about. I think what you are doing might be better, but just not sure. Did you feel like your hair looked greasy when you didn’t wash it for more than three or more days?

    Reply
    • zenbelly says

      November 2, 2022 at 5:26 pm

      I don’t find that it makes my hair greasy, no.

      Reply
  53. Kristen says

    February 6, 2023 at 11:21 am

    Best ever! Can’t believe it really worked!! No words to say how thankful I am! Did this for the first time only using products I had on hand. As soon as I went somewhere today I got an immediate compliment from a complete stranger. Game changer!!!!

    Reply
  54. David Harvey says

    February 20, 2024 at 5:10 pm

    I’ve been on a similar quest to find the ideal products for my curls, and it’s fascinating how our hair can change and adapt over time. I’ve heard great things about Bouncecurl, and your positive experience with their range makes me even more inclined to give it a try. Thanks for sharing your curly hair journey and product recommendations! It’s always a challenge finding the perfect products that work for our unique hair needs, so I appreciate your insights.

    Reply
  55. Em says

    June 13, 2024 at 3:16 am

    At the end of the day, curly hair fxxxing sux! I don’t have the time or inclination to get it right. I just grow it to weight down the curls!

    Reply
  56. Hair Salon Curly Hair San Francisco says

    July 10, 2024 at 3:57 am

    Embracing one’s natural curly hair can be a transformative journey, and this personal account beautifully captures that experience. The author’s candid reflections on learning to love their curls, despite societal pressures to conform, are both relatable and inspiring.

    Reply
  57. Hair says

    November 24, 2024 at 11:09 pm

    Embracing your natural curly hair is such an empowering journey! It’s refreshing to hear perspectives that don’t always align with the curly girl method, as everyone’s curls and preferences are unique. Sometimes, finding a routine that works for you means stepping outside the box. I’d love to know more about what products or techniques you use instead—curly hair thrives on personalized care! Sharing your experience helps others feel confident exploring what works best for their own curls.

    Reply

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